Spoiler for Northern Strata game
A continuation of my B2 rewrite. See here for notes from an earlier draft.
F. Lair of Pigeons
And it is when she is held prisoner that she emits the particles of a bird. And it is when she flees, launches down a line of flight, that she becomes-horse, even if it is the horse of death.
A Thousand Plateaus, 275
These pigeons have trained in the ways of violence. They bob their heads as they walk, and have the honoured purpose of facilitating communication among the different lairs.
The pigeon entrance is is guarded by a heavy barred door. At the door’s centre are three slots for mail. The uppermost slot is labeled “standard – 1gp,” the second is labeled “express – 10gp,” and the third is labeled “confidential – 100gp.” Beneath them is an additional slot for coins. At the base of the door are many skulls and an affixed runic warning: “Sometimes you are the pigeon.”
Pigeon Mailing System: Standard and express post will be delivered across the surrounding lairs and regions beyond. Standard post takes 2d6 days and is delivered through foot, express post is through courier pigeon and delivered in 1d4 days, and confidential post is never delivered, but taken to the vaults in room 27.
Each pigeon has a 1-in-6 chance of mail on their person. Roll on the table below, once for addresser and once for addressee.
| d12 | Addresser/Addressee | Encryption Method | Decrypted Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | beetle gardeners | none | fan mail |
| 2 | hermit couple | words spelled backwards | military report |
| 3 | fishfolk | letters upside down | noise complaint |
| 4 | halflings | all meanings opposite | declaration of war |
| 5 | shambling mound | invisible ink | religious proselytising |
| 6 | crabs | labeled “CONFIDENTIAL” | legal summons |
| 7 | giant slug | first letter of each word spells message | advertisement |
| 8 | plantfolk (taproots) | meaning encoded in scent | party invitation |
| 9 | plantfolk (bulbs/tubers) | trapped with poison spores | overdue library notice |
| 10 | fungal aliens | written in alien language | bill for services |
| 11 | gnolls | shorthand | therapy notes |
| 12 | feral bandits | understatement | wedding invitation |
- COMMON MAILROOM: Bird droppings litter the floor. 6 pigeon guards (HD 1+1, AC as Leather and Shield, Att 1 x bite 1d6) watch for mail, which arrives through copper tubes from the entrance. 8 beetle apprentices (HD 1-1, AC as Leather and Shield) training in a new profession, but are 75% likely to run back to Lair D in case of an attack. Among many tables are heaps of paper, 10 inks vials (20gp each), 50 quills (5 gp each), and red wax for sealing.
- TORTURE CHAMBER/PLAYROOM/MAIL STORAGE: 2 large, ugly pigeons (HD 2+1, AC as Chain) guard 6 prisoners in cages. One of the guards carries a jewel-encrusted mail opener worth 1000gp. Keys are in the southwest corner, hanging from chains. Prisoners:
- Altos the Geographer, convicted for mail fraud, scheduled for execution tonight. If rescued and returned to Fort Way, the rescuers will be given a 100gp reward and honorary status in the Cartographer’s Guild.
- Mertok the Guard (F1), hired by the Geographer in 1, convicted for support of mail fraud, fears heights. If rescued, will freely provide services for 1 year.
- Lata, the merchant’s wife, convicted for mail fraud, scheduled for execution tonight. Will reward rescuers with a +1 dagger and offer a further 1000gp for the assassination of her husband.
- Bath the Gnoll, convicted for mail theft
- Frederica the Guard (F1), same as 3, but fears spiders.
- EXPRESS MAILROOM: This room is used for sorting express mail. 7 pigeon herders (HD 1+1, AC as Leather and Shield, Att 1 x bite 1d6) attach pouches to 9 carrier pigeons (HD 1/2, AC as Leather, Att 1 x talon 1d4). The carrier pigeons are 2′ tall and trained to attack by aiming for the eyes.
- GUARD ROOM: 6 pigeon guards (HD 1+1, AC as Leather and Shield, Att 1 x bite 1d6), 3 with crossbows (AC as Leather when firing) guard the path to room 27 with their very lives.
- CONFIDENTIAL MAILROOM: Here lie the secret words entrusted to the pigeons for safekeeping, so that they may never be spoken aloud. 3 pigeon guards (AC as Chain) are here at all times, solemn in their watch. The confidential mail is stored in a large locked chest with a single slot. The key has long been lost to the ages, but it is possible to fish out pieces of mail with string or other means.
| d6 | Confidential Mail |
|---|---|
| 1 | an admission of guilt in dishonourable conduct, signed by the Warden of Fort Ray. Confesses to desertion in the Battle of Squares |
| 2 | a Cleric spell scroll case containing purify food and water, locate object, turn sticks to snakes |
| 3 | a confession of love from Apple the gnoll, addressed to his friend Bubbles |
| 4 | a Magic-User spellbook containing read languages, phantasmal forces, wizard lock, and fire ball |
| 5 | a full map of the G cavern |
| 6 | a letter from the hermit couple, apologizing to their son for bad parenting |
- STOREROOM: Goods stolen from the beetle gardeners, neatly arranged. A bouquet of roses worth 100gp (will die in 1 day if not preserved in water). A single pigeon guard (HD 1+1, AC as Leather and Shield, Att 1 x bite 1d6) watches over the spoils.
- GUARD ROOM: 2 pigeon guards (HD 1+1, AC as Leather and Shield, Att 1 x bite 1d6) with crossbows and shields. They fear the wrath of the postmaster.
- POSTMASTER’S QUARTERS: The postmeister (HD 5, AC as Plate and Shield, Att 1 x beak 1d6+2) consults with 4 pigeon assistants (HD 1+1, AC as Leather and Shield, Att 1 x bite 1d6). He is tall and handsome. His eyes are red with focus. The assistants hang on his every word, but do not always understand his commands. He carries a ruby-encrusted mail opener worth 2000gp and a wand of read languages with 7 charges.
Engraved above his office table is the first half of the Pigeon Creed: “Neither ice nor fog nor pirate nor net nor burning of day.” The second half has long been forgotten. The office desk has a false bottom: beneath it is a hidden compartment with 100 platinum, 300 gp, 400 sp, a fine stamp worth 1000gp, and a potion of poison. He will drink the poison before surrendering his secrets.
| d6 | Commands of the Postmeister |
|---|---|
| 1 | Fold yourself into a small envelope |
| 2 | A message must always be delivered |
| 3 | Watch the sky for fraud |
| 4 | Seal all lips |
| 5 | Fly and fall by your own wing |
| 6 | Scatter trash to the wind |